- mom: can you do me a favor?
- me: will you pay me?
- mom: why do i have to pay you to do me a favor?
- me: Humankind cannot gain anything without first giving something in return. To obtain, something of equal value must be lost. That is Alchemy's First Law of Equivalent Exchange.
me: what’s for dinner?
her: *spreads her legs*
so, did you not cook or ….. cause popeyes closes at 10 and i need to leave now if i’m gon make it.
Wanna be Rapper: Im finna drop this hot ass mixtape real soon all the tracks gone be fire!
"Hit me my thesis is due in 12 hours and I haven’t started it"
"Hit me I have a final in an hour and I didn’t study"
"Hit me I’ve been on a 24 hour drinking binge and I’m invincible"
"Hit me. You’re a university vehicle and I’ll get free tuition."
"Hit me I feel like a failure anyway"(via bl-ossomed)